That's one of the most used phrases among my crew of friends. Most of us are addicted to information, and there is an endless stream of data being presented to us that we are knowingly (or unknowingly) asked to sift through in order to make decisions. Did you know that the average US citizen consumes a little over three hours worth of advertisements (including sources such as the internet, magazines, television, radio, etc.) every day? As each advertisement shows us what we don't have, and what we "need," is it any wonder there is an ever-sprouting seed of discontentment among us? Is there any wonder that we have a constant fear inbreed into the most recent generations of “missing out”? (“Missing out” on what exactly? we’re not sure).
To be clear, I’m not blaming our discontent or indecisiveness on media. However, I am making a point that if we hold a mirror to our actions, the reflection points to a people wandering around frequently fretting, and never satisfied. We desire freedom and autonomy, without understanding that unlimited choices and independence has actually added to our bondage rather than taking it away.
Ever watched someone throw something away because they bought the exact same thing—only newer—because they thought they’d like it better? (Only to find they miss what they had? Buyers remorse, anyone?) Have you ever talked to a college student in a four-year university who had no idea what to do with their life? (Do they know they’re paying (or someone’s paying) thousands upon thousands of dollars for their indecision?*). Have you ever talked with someone who is getting out of a covenant marriage relationship because they have fallen “out” of love with someone? (Do they know they’re going to have to change everything about their life, and possibly put their children through years rebuilding their trust in human relationship?**)
We all know the old proverb: “The grass is always greener on the other side.” We live by it as if it were the way life is supposed to be. Yet, there is something inside each of us that knows this statement is incongruent with the way we want our lives to go. Wouldn’t we rather be able to enjoy the things we have? Wouldn’t we rather be discontent because of unjust behavior, instead of being discontent because everything around us is wonderful, yet we can’t enjoy it?
I have multiple amazing examples of selfless love in my life--but one in particular is our community care pastor. She looks for ways to do something I call "pre-blessing" others. Before she enters into a meeting or care-giving situation, she brings cards of encouragement or blankets--whether she needs them or not. Instead of looking at how others might serve her, she is constantly looking for ways to bless those she comes in contact with. That is not to say she doesn't graciously accept gifts or grace from others, but it is to say she is more concerned with the blessing than the being blessed. Because I get to see her in the day-to-day, I know it comes from a secure understanding of how she is already blessed in Christ that allows her to focus on blessing others.
I have multiple amazing examples of selfless love in my life--but one in particular is our community care pastor. She looks for ways to do something I call "pre-blessing" others. Before she enters into a meeting or care-giving situation, she brings cards of encouragement or blankets--whether she needs them or not. Instead of looking at how others might serve her, she is constantly looking for ways to bless those she comes in contact with. That is not to say she doesn't graciously accept gifts or grace from others, but it is to say she is more concerned with the blessing than the being blessed. Because I get to see her in the day-to-day, I know it comes from a secure understanding of how she is already blessed in Christ that allows her to focus on blessing others.
Fear drives out love, while Love drives out fear. Our culture would tell us to act first to prove ourselves secure and lovable, while faith tells us to rest first in the security of Love, and then act out of that Love. When you know you are wholly accepted and loved, there is no room for fear-driven discontentment. When you start caring for the grass that you have (and even bloom where you are planted), you don’t have time to look at any other grass. When you are being grateful for what you have and looking for ways to demonstrate that gratitude, you don’t have time to “miss out.” When you’re taken care of—you understand that real freedom and opportunity come within loving parameters.
The grass may be greener on the other side--but I bet it's because that guy is actually taking care of his grass.
"For, 'All people are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord endures forever.'" And this is the word that was preached to you."
--1 Peter 1:24-25
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* I’m not calling anyone out without also calling out my own indecision at the end of my four-year private university education. I’m sorry Mom, and Dad—and my current bank account.
**I’m not equipped to know what divorce is like, but I am equipped with the experience of helping multiple family members and friends pick up the pieces after a covenant relationship is broken. There’s a reason why Jesus hated divorce—not because He hates people, but because He hates it when we selfishly hurt each other.
